Just us sisters,no brother,any problem?!!!

Something very funny happened the other day. A potential proposal for my younger sister was suggested.
We are a family for 4, My parents and us two sisters, very close and extremely protective about each other. To me my sister is like this little toy that came in my life when I did NOT want her. She would really irritate me and I used to try to get rid of her. In school I would tell her not to bother me and stay away from me by making up these crazy rules. At home we would fight till blood was drawn. With time she became smarter and knew what buttons to push. She was sneaky just like the Fox, I on the other hand remained like the unchallenged king of the forest , strong but straight forward. Our relation changed over time and from fighting for the remote we started fighting over clothes, shoes, mess, car but our love for each other had snuck up upon us too. We had developed this unspoken bond that was difficult to break. In retrospect, I was always protective about my Fox. I would check on her in school thru her class mates, at home fill her time table, iron her uniform and protect her from bullies. I mean she was a small girl who never got beat up in school, I don’t think anyone had the guts to touch MY SISTER.
Obviously thru all of this the two of us never missed not having a brother, but I guess people around us knew better. They soon started asking my mom, why she had stopped at 2 girls. Though our parents never let us be affected but these comments, since luckily they were also of the opinion that girl or boy does not make a difference.

That is a brief background of the part my life relevant to this blog and I continue with the incidence that happened.

The father of that potential proposal was not too happy about the fact that we had no brother. His theory was, girls from families with no boys would not bare boys. When I came to know of this unfortunate individual and his family it made me was so mad that i would have kicked him in is butt had I been there. When my sister came to know of this she was just as mad and we asked mom not to even consider a meeting.(this was all before the first meeting)

Now it triggered an unshakable feeling with me. I have been thinking about this over and over again .Why is my society in which a goddess is as important as the god, a girl and her existence is tied around a male figure, Dad->brother->husband->son what about Mother->sister->daughter. I am not a misandrist. I love my dad and husband, their position in my life is irreplaceable but my mom and my sister are just as important. Moreover how can some arrogant man just negate a person’s qualities because she has no brothers and the society just stands and watches? I personally want to ask everyone, does this make any sense to their intellect and if not that why are we hanging on to this stupidity?
In today’s world a girl can do anything a boy can and this is just not a talk sake sentence, any idiot can see it around in society. So than why are we still fostering these beliefs? Just throw them away.
Why do girls parents have to pay the whole wedding expense, does the grooms side of family have no self respect?

A boys family actually thinks its their right to demand, which is so ridicules. Think about it if you treat the bride's side with anything but equality and respect, will the girl be able to forgive her husband and will it not cause a rift between them? It is almost a practice to be disrespective towards the girl’s family and make sadistic fun of them before, during and after wedding. This is so disfunctional.
When this incidence happened we sisters discussed if we really missed on having a brother the conclusion we came to was unanimous, we would have it no other way.

We have only one thing to say to the world,
Yes, Just Us Sisters, no brother, any problem?!!!

I don't See Color

I am originally from India. There are no colors there, in terms of skin. But that does not mean there is no discrimination. All my life I suffered from a dark girl syndrome.

Dark Girl syndrome

It’s when girls are socially tormented because their skin color is darker than other girls of the same race.

Society in general is partial towards the fair girl. What is worse is that women propel this psychology. Fair girls get an easy pass in life regardless of qualifications (generalization).
Darker girls are actually looked at as a liability and many times verbally taunted. Yes I have gone thru all of this!!!!

How I got thru this you ask? I gave a rats ass, to what people thought. They came to me and told me to use fair and lovely (a skin lightening bleach cream) I asked them if there was something for their personality in the market? But being sassy took a lot out of me since by nature, I am a very sensitive person .Most of the time I used it as a defense to cover for the hurt. I knew what they were saying was just stupid but it did hurt. As I grew up I thought of how the other girls survived this mental torture, since most of the girls have a dark skin in India.

The Fair girls would hop around actually believing all the crap people were feeding and looking down upon the darker girls. I mean what a stupid topic to waste time upon and to think girls face this issue while growing up, it’s so cruel. Any way I believe in the philosophy "Life is not fair"

So when I came to The USA and saw such a variety in terms of color, I was surprised and thrown off balance. My whole view of beauty and its components were challenged. What surprised me was how much the society I grew up in had affected me. In spite of my total rebellion on the color issue I was still programmed to judge beauty by color and one of the reasons, I realized, I never thought of myself as good looking. I could not see past color. There were so many questions that I asked myself to align me to the changed atmosphere. It was crazy, how a stupid thing like color affected me. Then I realized it was just a cultural shock that I was feeling.

I love my family and respect the society that I was brought up in. It gave me a lot of positive things but like all societies there are underling things that need to be changed and this ridiculous obsession with color is one of the things my society has to change. This change, I thought, will come if individual changes. That means I had to change and it was very easy for me. I looked for what makes a person beautiful instead what makes them look ugly. That was it, suddenly everyone around me was beautiful and shape, color, features just did not matter.

One day I went out to do my grocery and after a long time out, I realized something

I DON'T SEE COLORS .......it felt as though I finally fit in.